Is there a baby in there? The scan.

I can officially say there is a small human within!! Two days ago with plenty of jelly on my tummy a small contraption glided all over revealing on a large monitor above our heads a picture of a very active baby. That 12 weeks scan is a relief in many ways, besides the much needed assurances that something is growing within, it was the tick I needed to finally tell the world. No more excuses at dinner parties and get together when leaving early, or awkward work conversation. I am out and proud! The other great thing was for hubby to connect a bit more with what is happening. Even more for him this is all a bit surreal and until I start properly showing a bit mythical.
The entire process of the scan was a little scary. Here in the UK, the test is preformed at a hospital and in my mind they are alway slightly anxious places. The young and the old, the worried faces and the pacers all in one place. A certain smell always hovers and the so called neutral colors make me fidget. It’s always a maze, so you weave through corridors and knock on a door or two before you are nodded in with acceptance- yes it is here you belong. I wasn’t prepared for the blood test prior, and it caught me a little off guard. Our very fast talking and moving South African nurse, turned out to be lovely and I wondered how many of me he needed to calm down and make small chit chat with today. As you get ushered to the scan room about an hour after arrival you senses are heightened. Scan nurse is warm and gentle, she’s seen the look before. I answer her ‘how are you feeling?’ Question with ‘I think there is a baby in there ?’ She laughs . ‘Is this normal?’ She assures me that many new first time mums feel that way, and we will very soon find out.

As the monitor comes alive, and the room is filled with loud pounding I finally release , a tear rolls down my cheek and I hear very little after. Mesmerized I watch small human swim, I am certain it waves. All the fears stress and worry wash away with every loud and fast beat. Welcome little human!!


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